![]() ![]() It’s lonely, until you find someone else who had the same thing happen to them, and then another one, and another one, until you know so many people with different versions of the same story that it makes you shake with a deep, devastated pulse of anger. It’s disorienting enough to make the center of your own gravity collapse, over and over again. And if it doesn’t immediately fade away, it stabs at the open wound of your confusion to make the pain more visceral than the drug’s numbing effect otherwise allows. You reach back into the haze of the night to try and grasp something solid, but every shard of memory that does manage to cut through the fog is a tease. Trusting yourself, your body, and the intentions of everyone around you afterwards is a suddenly unimaginable hardship. ![]() Getting roofied - an annoyingly passive phrase for someone committing an inherently violent act against an unsuspecting person- makes for a dizzying, infuriatingly opaque experience. But when the first episode showed Arabella taking one (1) tequila shot minutes before she loses herself completely, I knew exactly what had happened, because I’ve had the same thing happen to me - twice. “I May Destroy You” doesn’t spell out what happened until Arabella and Alissa compare notes to confirm it (as best they can, anyway). With Coel’s gimlet-eyed view of her own trauma guiding the way, “I May Destroy You” offers a startlingly real, empathetic depiction of a situation that TV rarely gets even halfway right. She can never “officially” know what happened, even as she feels the keen pain of the truth radiating through her bones. By that point, though, it’s too late to confirm it with a test most of those drugs work their way out of your system within 24 hours. It takes someone else saying outright that she also mysteriously blacked out, and must have been roofied, for Arabella to recognize and accept, that the same might have happened to her. ![]() As the specter of terror lurks just in her periphery, Arabella spends much of the second episode trying to figure out the trajectory of her night while desperately assuming she must’ve had more to drink than she realized. Arabella, a longtime fan of chaotic nights out, doesn’t want to believe that this one went so horribly wrong when it’d be so much easier to chalk it up to bad judgment. Coel and director Sam Miller unveil this truth in fits and starts, blurry half-remembrances and hopeful second guesses. ![]()
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